Juney June

So I've been going in and out of a depression for the past few years. I feel that things are starting to look up, not only for myself but also for my wife. We are considering moving out of state for new opportunities. I feel inspired to create again. Life is still just as confusing and stressful, but just with more bright looking outcomes. Hope this is the end of a long running depression and the beginning of my new life. Plans for living, laughing, loving, and nurturing all including myself. If you ever feel down, don't hesitate to ask for help.

Mayday

Last month we finished moving to our new temporary home. Had two getaways just to destress. My father turned 88 years old. Plans for May include graduation for niece and some other stuff. Will add more later.

Aperuuls!

the first day in April and all the plants are budding out. Things I enjoy and appreciate this time of year is the robins singing, new plants popping up, springtime showers, and the thought that summer is coming up next.

Been really depressed about life for the past 3 months. Down about life in general, don't have much in the way of faith, and my confidence in myself is way low. I wish I had more to offer, but I don't. I'm not completely hurting financially, but I just don't have much to allow me to give back or go where I need to. I'm not able to provide for my spouse like I would like to. I wish I was doing what I love which is being creative and helping others. Because of my lack to make a better paycheck we are selling our home to move to something smaller. Although I won't missing cleaning it, the house is a one of kind gem. I will miss it.

March Smarch

I'm turning 30, big deal.

Feboooairy

Blah, be back tomorrow.

So February, here we are again. The shortest month of the year. January was a tough month to make it through, but it's over and we are headed in a better direction. Have had very little time for art. Need to get motivated. This painting is of a fantasy creature, a mixture of a giraffe and a hyena. No real reason for it other than I'm crazy in the head like that. My art is funny I think. It really has no place other than in my head. I don't know who would like it and why they would. It's a compulsion to get it out and on a tangible surface so I can reflect on it. Each piece than has a story in my head for where is been and come from. I imagine what it would be like to meet or see in person. My mind is a funny place to be, very quiet, but full of emotions and theories. One day it will all make cents. One day it will all disappear. One day it will all make sense.

New Moon Year

So it's a new moon, if you didn't know the last time this event occurred was 19 years ago in 1995. This illustration above is my current obsession, ink wash that is. Really enjoy working in this medium and look forward to expanding my knowledge of it. Who knows where or what I will do with it though. My other crush would be anything rebellious theme or nature. 

I'm lost at this time in my life. I'll be 30 this year, and like so many of my other brothers and sisters I feel dissatisfied with life. Hope to put my house on the market. Hope to find a new house. Hope to find some answers about adoption. Hope to start a career. Hope learn more this year. Hope to become stronger. Hope to bring happiness to those I love. Hope to help those less fortunate than I. Hope to be healthy. Hope to have another wonderful year with my family and friends.

Hipper December

I will add to this post tomorrow, doublely so. Okay, so let's have a review of this year...

Jan. Dad was placed in the Oklahoma Law Enforcement Hall of Fame

Feb. Dad had first stroke - Recovered amazing well

Mar. 29th Birthday - Without incident and unremarkable

Apr. Was hired to be an Art Instructor at Pinot's Pallet in Tulsa

May. Realized our wedding was too tough to conquer, so Meg and I made secret plans together.

Jun. Married my love, Megan Marie Bell. June 11th 2013 Cumberland Island, GA

Jul. Gain a new position as an EMT at Big Cabin, OK, Start 48 hr Thu, Fri shift

Aug. Amazed at how cool this summer has been, no real heat waves this year

Sep. Meg tells me she is willing and wants to move to the country

Oct. Had a nice fall seasonal leaf change

Nov. Worked like never before, learned to fried a turkey

Dec. Which brings us up to speed.

I've been working a lot in ink wash. Made some great art. Met a lot of cool people. Look forward to next years adventures and what my wife and I will encounter. I have come to a realization that I want to make life easier on others as much as I can, physically and mentally. I don't understand why we struggle in life when everyone can do a little to help. Love one another and give without expecting any reward. Good luck to all and hope to see or meet you next year!